Block 813: October 15, 2015

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Another day down.

15 days until this show opens and we can move on with our lives.

Date: October 15, 2015

Crane: 813

Days Spent on Project: 968

Location: NW Portland, OR

Person I would have sent it to: TBD

Music I listened to while sewing: I started listening to The Nutcracker today at work… I’m designing a Nutcracker spoof for a scene in our Christmas show, and I’m incredibly excited by it.

Thoughts/Feelings behind the block: It’s almost 8pm and I’m sitting in my window-enclosed balcony, staring out into the darkness. It’s weird to think that two months ago, it would have been daylight still at this point in the nighttime.

I’m going through an interesting spell at work. Show Number Two of the season opens tomorrow, and I couldn’t be more ready for it to open. It wasn’t a bad experience at all, but I’m ready for it to jump out of the nest and run for seven weeks. Show Number Three is tripping over itself as we head into tech this weekend. It comforts me to know that every department in the building is behind. No one is ready for this show to happen. I still don’t really know what clothes people are wearing when we start the show. I don’t think the designer knows either.

But, simultaneously with this malaise about this show’s approach, I feel a sense of belonging here. That is strange. The production manager we now have has my back, and I think he therefore will have my department’s back. I think all the other department heads see me as a part of the team now, too. I survived one season. I’m still here. I’m helping to make things happen. So, I feel like I can speak about the work and the workload and the expectations and the (overwhelming) jobs people give us and be heard.

Also, along with this dichotomy of being over it and feeling welcomed, I feel a sense of comfort. Next week is going to suck. I won’t get a day off for another 15 days. We’re going over budget with materials and labor. The shop staff is ready to move on. But, still: I feel okay. It is what it is and it’s going to be hard and disappointing, but whatever. Just survive it and move on. Something better will come along.

That last attitude surprises me: it will all be okay even if it is hard and/or boring and/or frustrating.

It’s weird. I can’t wait for this show to open and then to be over.

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