So, unfortunately, this will possibly be brief.
I am so ready for this day to put itself to bed.
But I do like today’s Crane.
Date: September 25, 2015
Days Spent on Project: 948
Location: NW Portland, OR
Person I would have sent it to: TBD
Music I listened to while sewing: I’ve got the remixes for Kelly Clarkson’s Invincible on again.
I realized today that it needs to be an anthem for my life.
Thoughts/Feelings behind the block: Well, Jeez.
What the hell.
I’m drinking wine again. It’s been a day. It’s been a day where you just want to throw up your hands and say… Can it just be the weekend because I don’t want to deal with any of you for 48 hours.
My staff is fine. We’re great. We’re plugging along. We’re making progress. Because we did so much this week, we might be in a good place and (technically) a wee bit ahead of schedule. BUT…
I’m actually tired of designers. HOW CRAZY IS THAT? I, who once was a freelance designer in New York, AM TIRED OF DEALING WITH DESIGNERS.
I’m aware how weird and tragic and sad and awkward this is on a variety of levels.
If you want to design- if you want to do this work- if you care about doing the work- DO THE WORK.
I had a good moment today, when I realized, “As the shop manager, I can and will say that the responsibilities that you’re shirking off on me are not my responsibilities to cover. You’re floundering. You’re taking my (and my shop’s) help for granted. You’re trying to save your own a$$.”
And I said that. More politically and tactfully, but directly, of course, but I said it.
When I designed in New York City, I *DID* work my a$$ off for the projects I committed to. I overworked myself. That designers here in Portland and also designers on the regional theater market feel they can shirk their responsibilities makes me really frustrated.
I refuse to fill in for them. I refuse to cover their asses. I refuse to help do their job, especially if they’re doing the bare minimum.
Today was all about drawing the line in the sand. They (THEY) can deal with it.
I have 11 shows to deal with in 9 months. If they want to start talking about being overworked for the pay they’re on, I’m more than willing to discuss that with them.
Okay, I’m being a Bitter Betty… and this large glass of wine has emptied itself and refilled itself and emptied itself. I’m off for now.