Block 681: June 4, 2015


I get to go to the dentist today for two fillings. I am so excited for 2pm!

Yay for having dental insurance and being able to fix things!


Date: June 4, 2015

Crane: 681

Days Spent on Project: 835

Location: NW Portland, OR

Person I would have sent it to: Russ R.

Again, back in the summer of 2013, I was desperate for support. I was looking for a network to count on, to help me, to work with me. It was an especially difficult few months, beginning in May. I got a phone call about the Broadway transfer of a workshop I had worked on for a month the previous year. Would I be available to work as the Associate Designer?

I should have said no. The process wasn’t ideal the previous year, why would it be any better?

I was quick to find out it woudn’t be better, it would make me bitter, and leave me fired and without months of work as I cleared my schedule for it.

This, on top of the assisting I did for a company that conveniently assumed that I was volunteering my time- unpaid- for the weeks I worked for them.

And then the group of actors in that downtown theater company that proved belligerent and hostile.

I decided I needed an agent. An agent, for a 10% cut of my fees, would help me get a contract so I could get paid, make sure I wasn’t being taken advantage of, help get me to another level. Right?

No. That’s not what agents are for.

I’m still trying to figure that out, but I’d still love to have one… if it would help my design career and lifestyle.

Russ was the third agent I reached out to when I was looking to find help and advice. I’d known of her since I finished grad school. Many of my classmates and classmates ahead of me were being represented by her, so her name has been tossed around as someone who was “young designer” and “Yale friendly.”

I reached out to her. I was careful to mention how we were professionally connected (Yale. You also represent these designers, whom I’ve worked for. Etc.).

And she responded. She knew my name, of course.

I was also not ready to be added to her roster. She was booked.

I learned I needed to make myself more attractive. I needed more work! But how do I get the work?

Music I listened to while sewing: I am listening to remixes of a song called “Women Beat Their Men.” I have no idea who originally wrote or composed or gave birth to this song, but I think it’s all sorts of everything right now.

Thoughts/Feelings behind the block: So, I have 319 more Cranes to go.

If I stay on track, I think I’ll have 1,000 Cranes on April 17th, 2016.

That’s so close? 10 months or so?

What is this really going to look like when it’s done? I need to make some decisions so I can plan for Phase II.

I don’t think is going to be a usable quilt. It won’t be on a bed.

I keep thinking back to Ann Hamilton and the Bayeux Tapestry and Timelines and Pointillism and As You Like It and String and Light and Sound and the Green Lion Party I went to at the McKittrick Hotel in 2013.

It kinda makes sense to me.

This won’t be done for years, I’m afraid. And, given the nature that I’ll keep living as long as it’s not done, the details of it all might grow with it as I age.

Need some money. And space.

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