Block 183: August 26, 2013



It’s Monday, Ladies and Gentlemen.

Here we go!

Date: August 26, 2013

Crane: 183

Days Spent on Project: 190

Location: Apartment, Washington Heights, NYC

Person I would have sent it to: Rebecca R.

I mentioned in yesterday’s post that I ended up spending most of my free time at my friend’s Kate’s apartment in London. Like me, she lived with three other American students (“flatmates” as we liked to call them). Rebecca was her roommate in the flat; she was also friends with Andrew L. (the crane from 2 days ago) from their college.

I would describe her as confident and brassy, a presence that was always welcome and fun.

Thinking back to London, as I’ve been doing for a few days now, I’m surprised I survived over there. Granted, I was only 20 (!) at the time but, in hindsight, I’m amazed I was able to live on my own and feed myself and make friends and function. I had a lot of growing up left to do; I was so GREEN! I’m not saying I was immature back then, I just can’t believe how… naive? unaware? untouched? simple?… I was back then.

Life is certainly much easier when you’re 20 and you’re in school and things are done to/for you. Well, I’ll say that has been my experience. I’m sure there are people who could argue the opposite. I wonder, when I’m 50, will I look back on my 30s and think the same thing?

Music I listened to while sewing: I’ve got the albums from Ken Burns’ documentary Jazz playing again. I spent last night watching another episode, trying to avoid the inanity of the VMA’s last night that were in Brooklyn.

If anything, just reading about them on Facebook and Twitter made me realize I’m no longer the demographic that pop culture wants around. Yes, I’m a little obsessive about Lady Gaga in general, I’ll admit that. And I will say that back in college, I would swoon as hard as anyone for N-Sync. But, reading the reactions (and watching some clips online) have left me a little underwhelmed with the state of contemporary music.

Watching hours of TV about the evolution of jazz, with its history, its contributors, its technique, its struggle, its seduction… In 100 years, will we be using similar adjectives to talk about today’s music? Or will we just be talking about the style of it all?

I think I’m officially old.

Thoughts/Feelings behind the block: Okay, to be honest, I’m a little anxious again. I’m starting to think that maybe it’s just a Sunday night/Monday morning thing with me.

I’m not sure it’s doing me any good to worry about life like I am.

I worry that I’m not getting the most of out myself that I can right now. Yes, the work I’m doing is nice. The people I’m working with are nice. The side projects I’m starting are fun. But, I don’t feel like I’m pushing myself as hard as I need to. I’m not sure how to push myself.

I need to get over that.

Okay, off to get the day rolling, large coffee in hand…

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